Who do you love me or the thought of me? me or the thought of me?

No i'm not the man i used to be lately
See you met me at an interesting time
If my past is any sign of your future
You should be warned before i let you inside

Hold on to whatever you find 
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find I don't trust myself with loving you

I will beg my way into your garden
I will break my way out when it rains
Just to get back to the place where i started
So i can watch you back all over again 

Who do you love?
Who do you love me or the thought of me? me or the thought of me?